As I Sit & Wait… – Poem

As I sit and wait

What will be your fate

I cry tears of sorrow

Not knowing what will come tomorrow

I pray for the best

But really deep inside I am a mess

I have to be strong

Even when you ask me what’s wrong

I miss the days when you would sing a song

You really helped me get along

You showed me how to feel

Even when I didn’t want to be real

I forever owe you a debt

But I am so glad we met

My first words to you were, “we are not compatible”

But neither one of us realized how valuable

We would become to each other

I told you, “one day we would drive to NJ to see your mother”

All of these events that had to take place

To make room and carve out a new space

God always knows what is best

Even amid these very tests

Don’t worry what may come

We must enjoy today, down to the last crumb

God forgive me for not slowing down sooner

I need You to adjust my tuner

So I can pick up every thought

And weave it into my life with a knot

Never to let go of what You give

Yet constantly learning to forgive

Lord be with us today

Keep us and don’t let us stray

For in Your arms

Is where we belong

Hold us tight

And tell us everything will be alright. 🙏

Copyright 2018 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

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Prayer – A Short Poem

Prayer

A simple request

Sometimes we are scared

To get things off our chest

Dont let life be a bear

You too can be blessed

Christ called us to share

Even if the storm is about to crest

Don’t just stare

What you face may just be a test

Prayer can break that snare

Time to confess🙏

Can I Have A Real Moment With You?

Lately I have been asked even more, “how is your wife doing?” Overall the fact that she is still here with us has been the biggest blessing ever. I thank God daily for each day and even each moment that I get to spend with her.

We used to love going on long walks together. We would talk about the future, share stories of our past, and even share thoughts about growing our family. So much has changed in such a short time.

Yesterday I had to explain to a coworker that my wife has a hard time just letting the dogs outside. God has done an amazing thing by healing Kristeen enough to get her off of the oxygen, but the battle she still faces today is her heart rate jumps up to 140 bpm anytime she gets up to walk or even standing to brush her teeth.

At this point Kristeen is not even able to walk around a store with me, she can’t do the simple things like go grocery shopping, and even trying on clothes because she has lost weight is a struggle, but no matter how much life has changed for us, God has still showed us that He is in control.

I don’t mind pushing my wife around in a wheel chair. We have been to the zoo plenty of times with the kids and each time I push her all over the park. My bride is my gift from the Lord and no matter how much “work” I have to do because of the cancer, I do it willingly because I love my wife.

Don’t get me wrong, I do have my moments when I become short tempered. I have to constantly remind myself to be patient and loving each time Kristeen calls my name because she needs something. She is not doing it because she is lazy, but instead because she needs me now more than ever. I have to submit to her needs and serve her.

I don’t know what the future holds but I serve a God that knows it all and what we will face. People try to tell me that I am strong but I remind them that I am weak and my strength is found in the Lord. I can’t imagine facing difficulty without God on my side.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

The doctor said we might have 6 months if no treatment or maybe a year with treatment. So far it is been 10 months since we found out about the stage 4 Lung Cancer and each time we see God defying the doctors prognosis we give Him the glory. A doctor can only do what he knows, but God is the true healer. God can heal when medicine can’t.

I don’t know what you are facing today, but I ask you, have you come to God in prayer about that situation? If you are trying to do it alone the weight will be too much to handle. Call upon the name of the Lord and exercise that faith! Just like our physical bodies, our spiritual body needs to be used consistently.

Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

For My Son – Poem

When you were born

My world was torn

By when I looked into your eyes

Oh what a surprise

God blessed me with a baby boy

Oh such joy

Your mom almost died

The doctors said her levels were too high

I was focused on you

God told me He would pull her through

The nurse combed your hair

I watched as your lungs took in air

Amazed by what God has done

I can’t believe my first son

But isn’t that amazing

As we stand there in awe & gazing

We know not what the future holds

We trust God’s words that have been told

Raise him up in the Lord

Even when he says he is bored

The word of God will give him a rock

That he can fall back onto when shock

Arises within his heart

Because the enemy will shoot his fiery dart

To attack the ones who are weak

Even now as we speak

But my trust remains in You

The only one who has brought me through

The good the bad the ugly

The nasty the terrible the pain

Thank you Jesus for Your grace

Because I have tried to run this race

I can’t keep up anymore

My son I give to You to watch once more

Guide him when the darkness comes

Teach him who to turn from

Lord I must trust your word

You provide for all the birds

Surely You will take care of my son

Every time he tries to run

Love him back into Your arms

Raise him like a fawn on a farm

Nourish his young mind

There isn’t much time left to grind

Thank you God for taking my fears

Please wipe away all my tears

If You Only Knew – Poem

If you only knew

What happened when I was through

I tried to give up

But for some reason God refilled my cup

I tried to run away

But God called me back and invited me to stay

How many times must I try to run

Every time my life comes undone

My pain is more than I can bear

Which is why I cry to Jesus because this world is not fair

Broken relationships almost did me in

Then I was reminded of how Jesus forgives our sin

But God you just don’t understand

How many times I have been burnt, I can’t count them on one hand

Lord I can’t do this anymore

I keep falling and hitting the floor

Why can’t you end this life of mine

You are in charge not Father Time

No matter what the score

I can’t come back anymore

This game is over, I am finished

I was strong like Popeye and his spinach

But then reality set in

And I finally gave in

How can I face tomorrow

When today already has me in sorrow

You don’t understand

I have always been banned

Turned away

Every person pushed, that came my way

But now You say it will all be okay?

How do You know, this pain won’t go away

I pray and pray and ask to be set free

But the shade continues to come like an oak tree

Caught up in darkness no matter how hard I fight

Jesus I think it is time to turn off this light

And say goodnight

Then I will be alright

Stuck in darkness with nothing to see

I don’t think You have the power to break me free

I should have been gone a long time ago

But You came and sat next to me like a bro

God my pain it causes such strain

Just like my newspaper caught in the rain

The words are beginning to smear

Please take away all my fear

I know I can’t do this alone

But thank God You are sitting upon the throne

Help me God to over come

Remove everything that has caused me to become numb

I pray dear God that today will change

I am tired of feeling so strange

My bride needs You more than me

Yet my own fear is all I can see

Lord we pray for continued healing

You know how hard I have been dealing

Trying to get past what satan has been stealing

Back on my knees I continue kneeling

Praying for something more

Praying you will open a new door

We need a breakthrough in her body and for my soul

Restore what satan has stole

God my heart is weak

I come before You, the outcome looks bleak

Please dear God give me more time

The time has come for me to end this rhyme

My Cry To You – Poem

I am counting every blessing

Especially while I am stressing

God has provided

Even while I was undecided

My world was falling

On Jesus I was calling

Save me Father from all this struggle

Too many things I am trying to juggle

My strength is failing

I turn to You for the unveiling

Of Your promises

Just like doubting Thomas

My faith longs to see Your nail scarred hands

My fears continue to add up like grains of sand

Yet I should cast my fears on You

Because You care for me & that is true

My thoughts fill my mind

They cause me to be blind

Father touch my head

Make it clear instead

Open my life to all that is true

Continue to pull me through

My eyes are full of tears

My pain no one shares

For only I can bear

This struggle has no compare

Others offer help

But all I can do is whelp

My words I do share

So others can see my prayers

I offer up all I have to You my King

Remove this fear & sting

Put up a shield of protection

Remove my sins like an injection

Cure me from all the pain

Set me free from every chain

I call upon Your name

Cleanse me from all blame

God I need You

You are the glue

The substance that holds me together

That calms the weather

Your words bound together by leather

Your voice soft like a feather

Let this Bible teach me

May it bring me to my knees

Teach me to wholly trust

Teach me to always discuss

Your words for all to hear

That soon You draw near❗️

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

Copyright 2018 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

Hear My Cry Oh Lord – Poem

So now I sit and wait

Wondering if it is too late

Waiting for answers to my questions

Everyone giving me suggestions

Oh what a journey this has been

Asking God when when when

When will this be over

When will Your healing spillover

Day and night we pray

That she will reach her next birthday

Lord we need more time

We know You are working overtime

All of our needs we bring before You

We know there is still much to do

We call upon Your name

The name of Jesus we claim

We cry out with our souls

Please make Kristeen whole

Each day brings new circumstances

Yet You have provided for all of our finances

God you amaze

Our hearts set ablaze

We believe You raised

Jesus Christ as everyone gave praise

Do it again Lord

We pray in one accord

We call upon Thee

To set Kristeen free

Bind up that cancer

You are the only answer

May all the people see

In Jesus name cancer does flee

We place our faith in You

Please make Kristeen brand new

I have entered my cry

Now I wait for Your reply…

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

Copyright 2018 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

Waiting For A Breakthrough – Poem

Who am I

A question we all ask but why

Looking for the meaning of life

Yet this life cuts like a knife

A wound deep beneath the skin

Almost like it was built-in

Why do I have this pain

Building up like a bad sprain

Everyone offers help to lift you up

But that is only a momentary pickup

So today who has reached out

Who has helped me with this doubt

I implore you to never give up

Stop trying to cover-up

All the pain that holds you down

All the pain that causes you to frown

All the pain that makes you feel let down

All the pain that makes you want to breakdown

There has to be more

Than what you can buy in the store

I want you to keep singing

Your voice always in my ear bringing

My spirit up

Even when I have a buildup

Of pain

All caught in my brain

But the easy answer

Is there is no cure for cancer

Who dealt me these cards

I have always been on guard

Trying to protect the ones I love

Keep them close to me like a glove

But no matter how hard I try

The end continues to draw nigh

I want to enjoy today

Please don’t push me away

I know you are scared

But that is why Jesus shared

His life on the cross

To remind satan that He was the boss

Today I plead with you

To let go of everything that is making you blue

It is time to restore all that is true

God’s word kicks evil like Kung Fu

I can’t pull you through

But if you have faith Jesus will come through

Can I ask you a question

Will you stop all the aggression

Will you begin with confession

This is just my suggestion

Faith removes the depression

And leaves a positive impression

We are made in the image of God

Except Adam & Eve allowed us to become flawed

Nonetheless by the grace of God

We can now applaud

For God has given us a way

So we will no longer betray

The Son of Man

This has been God’s plan

To sacrifice His only Son

He said “it is finished” & then it was done

God help me remain strong

All the day long

Even when life happens

Help me to continue laughing

I give my life to You

I am waiting for a breakthrough

Copyright 2017 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

We Didn’t Plan This – Poem

How can you understand

Cancer was never planned

How did this happen

Where is your compassion

People complaining about nothing

Always talking about something

Yet this pain is not leaving

Here I am grieving

The world constantly deceiving

Yet the sheep are still unbelieving

How can I move forward

The questions sound like a broken recorder

How is she doing

Questions sound like they are interviewing

We are waiting on a miracle

Something that is biblical

Not searching for “a” healer

Yet constantly checking for a fever

Looking for “The Healer”

To bind up the cancer like a concealer

Not just hide it

But transform it

Remove the cells that are attacking

While the doctors are tracking

So they can see

That God can do anything

Meanwhile I get inspired

Even when I am tired

God keeps speaking to my mind

Wanting me to reach out to the blind

I am just a man looking to share God’s plan

I reached out to this particular man

Where is the man that wanted to be

More than what the world said he could achieve

A man chasing after God

Instead of trying to avoid the rod

Common man don’t give me this or that

It is time to get back on track

What more are you waiting for

God is standing, knocking, on your front door❗️🚪

I can’t save you

But I can remind you

Jesus died to save you

He won’t run from you

No matter how long it takes

He waits patiently even when we try to be fake

Our feelings may be hurt

Put back on your shirt

Nobody wants to see that

It is time to fall flat

On our faces

And get back in God’s good graces. 🙏

I praise God for my pain

Because He allows me to see through the rain

It is just a storm

The prayers continue to transform

All my pain into a testimony

No I am not trying to be phony

My story is not over

It is hard to find like a 4 leaf clover

Buried among many chapters

I am praying for the rapture

Jesus I don’t know how much more I can take

Take a hold of my soul and shake

Cause me to remain strong

Continue to show me where I belong

Your power is stronger

And keeps me fighting longer

Hold me up

Fill my cup

Cause me to overflow

Pour out so others may grow

Closer to You Lord

It is You alone that I adore❗️
Copyright 2017 KNGMusic & Praise First Publishing

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com