If You Only Knew – Poem

If you only knew

What happened when I was through

I tried to give up

But for some reason God refilled my cup

I tried to run away

But God called me back and invited me to stay

How many times must I try to run

Every time my life comes undone

My pain is more than I can bear

Which is why I cry to Jesus because this world is not fair

Broken relationships almost did me in

Then I was reminded of how Jesus forgives our sin

But God you just don’t understand

How many times I have been burnt, I can’t count them on one hand

Lord I can’t do this anymore

I keep falling and hitting the floor

Why can’t you end this life of mine

You are in charge not Father Time

No matter what the score

I can’t come back anymore

This game is over, I am finished

I was strong like Popeye and his spinach

But then reality set in

And I finally gave in

How can I face tomorrow

When today already has me in sorrow

You don’t understand

I have always been banned

Turned away

Every person pushed, that came my way

But now You say it will all be okay?

How do You know, this pain won’t go away

I pray and pray and ask to be set free

But the shade continues to come like an oak tree

Caught up in darkness no matter how hard I fight

Jesus I think it is time to turn off this light

And say goodnight

Then I will be alright

Stuck in darkness with nothing to see

I don’t think You have the power to break me free

I should have been gone a long time ago

But You came and sat next to me like a bro

God my pain it causes such strain

Just like my newspaper caught in the rain

The words are beginning to smear

Please take away all my fear

I know I can’t do this alone

But thank God You are sitting upon the throne

Help me God to over come

Remove everything that has caused me to become numb

I pray dear God that today will change

I am tired of feeling so strange

My bride needs You more than me

Yet my own fear is all I can see

Lord we pray for continued healing

You know how hard I have been dealing

Trying to get past what satan has been stealing

Back on my knees I continue kneeling

Praying for something more

Praying you will open a new door

We need a breakthrough in her body and for my soul

Restore what satan has stole

God my heart is weak

I come before You, the outcome looks bleak

Please dear God give me more time

The time has come for me to end this rhyme

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My Cry To You – Poem

I am counting every blessing

Especially while I am stressing

God has provided

Even while I was undecided

My world was falling

On Jesus I was calling

Save me Father from all this struggle

Too many things I am trying to juggle

My strength is failing

I turn to You for the unveiling

Of Your promises

Just like doubting Thomas

My faith longs to see Your nail scarred hands

My fears continue to add up like grains of sand

Yet I should cast my fears on You

Because You care for me & that is true

My thoughts fill my mind

They cause me to be blind

Father touch my head

Make it clear instead

Open my life to all that is true

Continue to pull me through

My eyes are full of tears

My pain no one shares

For only I can bear

This struggle has no compare

Others offer help

But all I can do is whelp

My words I do share

So others can see my prayers

I offer up all I have to You my King

Remove this fear & sting

Put up a shield of protection

Remove my sins like an injection

Cure me from all the pain

Set me free from every chain

I call upon Your name

Cleanse me from all blame

God I need You

You are the glue

The substance that holds me together

That calms the weather

Your words bound together by leather

Your voice soft like a feather

Let this Bible teach me

May it bring me to my knees

Teach me to wholly trust

Teach me to always discuss

Your words for all to hear

That soon You draw near❗️

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

Copyright 2018 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

Hear My Cry Oh Lord – Poem

So now I sit and wait

Wondering if it is too late

Waiting for answers to my questions

Everyone giving me suggestions

Oh what a journey this has been

Asking God when when when

When will this be over

When will Your healing spillover

Day and night we pray

That she will reach her next birthday

Lord we need more time

We know You are working overtime

All of our needs we bring before You

We know there is still much to do

We call upon Your name

The name of Jesus we claim

We cry out with our souls

Please make Kristeen whole

Each day brings new circumstances

Yet You have provided for all of our finances

God you amaze

Our hearts set ablaze

We believe You raised

Jesus Christ as everyone gave praise

Do it again Lord

We pray in one accord

We call upon Thee

To set Kristeen free

Bind up that cancer

You are the only answer

May all the people see

In Jesus name cancer does flee

We place our faith in You

Please make Kristeen brand new

I have entered my cry

Now I wait for Your reply…

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

Copyright 2018 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

Waiting For A Breakthrough – Poem

Who am I

A question we all ask but why

Looking for the meaning of life

Yet this life cuts like a knife

A wound deep beneath the skin

Almost like it was built-in

Why do I have this pain

Building up like a bad sprain

Everyone offers help to lift you up

But that is only a momentary pickup

So today who has reached out

Who has helped me with this doubt

I implore you to never give up

Stop trying to cover-up

All the pain that holds you down

All the pain that causes you to frown

All the pain that makes you feel let down

All the pain that makes you want to breakdown

There has to be more

Than what you can buy in the store

I want you to keep singing

Your voice always in my ear bringing

My spirit up

Even when I have a buildup

Of pain

All caught in my brain

But the easy answer

Is there is no cure for cancer

Who dealt me these cards

I have always been on guard

Trying to protect the ones I love

Keep them close to me like a glove

But no matter how hard I try

The end continues to draw nigh

I want to enjoy today

Please don’t push me away

I know you are scared

But that is why Jesus shared

His life on the cross

To remind satan that He was the boss

Today I plead with you

To let go of everything that is making you blue

It is time to restore all that is true

God’s word kicks evil like Kung Fu

I can’t pull you through

But if you have faith Jesus will come through

Can I ask you a question

Will you stop all the aggression

Will you begin with confession

This is just my suggestion

Faith removes the depression

And leaves a positive impression

We are made in the image of God

Except Adam & Eve allowed us to become flawed

Nonetheless by the grace of God

We can now applaud

For God has given us a way

So we will no longer betray

The Son of Man

This has been God’s plan

To sacrifice His only Son

He said “it is finished” & then it was done

God help me remain strong

All the day long

Even when life happens

Help me to continue laughing

I give my life to You

I am waiting for a breakthrough

Copyright 2017 KNG Music & Praise First Publishing

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

We Didn’t Plan This – Poem

How can you understand

Cancer was never planned

How did this happen

Where is your compassion

People complaining about nothing

Always talking about something

Yet this pain is not leaving

Here I am grieving

The world constantly deceiving

Yet the sheep are still unbelieving

How can I move forward

The questions sound like a broken recorder

How is she doing

Questions sound like they are interviewing

We are waiting on a miracle

Something that is biblical

Not searching for “a” healer

Yet constantly checking for a fever

Looking for “The Healer”

To bind up the cancer like a concealer

Not just hide it

But transform it

Remove the cells that are attacking

While the doctors are tracking

So they can see

That God can do anything

Meanwhile I get inspired

Even when I am tired

God keeps speaking to my mind

Wanting me to reach out to the blind

I am just a man looking to share God’s plan

I reached out to this particular man

Where is the man that wanted to be

More than what the world said he could achieve

A man chasing after God

Instead of trying to avoid the rod

Common man don’t give me this or that

It is time to get back on track

What more are you waiting for

God is standing, knocking, on your front door❗️🚪

I can’t save you

But I can remind you

Jesus died to save you

He won’t run from you

No matter how long it takes

He waits patiently even when we try to be fake

Our feelings may be hurt

Put back on your shirt

Nobody wants to see that

It is time to fall flat

On our faces

And get back in God’s good graces. 🙏

I praise God for my pain

Because He allows me to see through the rain

It is just a storm

The prayers continue to transform

All my pain into a testimony

No I am not trying to be phony

My story is not over

It is hard to find like a 4 leaf clover

Buried among many chapters

I am praying for the rapture

Jesus I don’t know how much more I can take

Take a hold of my soul and shake

Cause me to remain strong

Continue to show me where I belong

Your power is stronger

And keeps me fighting longer

Hold me up

Fill my cup

Cause me to overflow

Pour out so others may grow

Closer to You Lord

It is You alone that I adore❗️
Copyright 2017 KNGMusic & Praise First Publishing

http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

Do You Remember When…


Do you remember the first time you received bad news? Last week my wife was in the hospital with what everyone thought was pneumonia. The doctor did a bronchoscopy and didn’t find any tumors so we thought we were in the clear. The biopsy takes a couple of days to come back. I was the first one to get the phone call and the doctor said, “it is cancer.” I was immediately in shock, I didn’t know how to respond, well how could I other then scream internally and question God why why why?

Kristeen’s mom died from lung cancer that metastasized to her brain about 3.5 years ago, but her mom smoked and was much older. I couldn’t comprehend how this could be happening to such a young woman. My wife has been such a giving person of herself and her time to so many people. I immediately thought God I am not ready to give my wife to you, I need her here, my kids need her here.

Yesterday we met with the oncologist and he gave us what the treatment options are. Of course I wasn’t thrilled with our options or the fact that this cancer is not cureable according to modern day medicine, but I still hold on to the fact that I serve a miracle working God and just because the doctors say there is no way doesn’t mean that God can’t do it. My dad was told he would never walk again and he has been walking for many years still.

The prognosis was very scary, I won’t lie about that, but I had to ask what the doctors thought about how much more time I would have with my wife. Some of you may know and understand that Kristeen is at stage 4 and the cancer has spread from her lungs, to her bones, and even to her brain. I try not to focus on the time we have left, but instead leave time in God’s hand while I take in every moment I have left with my bride. I love my wife and wouldn’t trade her for anything in the world.

I will leave everyone with this, don’t take anything for granted and be thankful for everything that God has blessed you with because in an instant everything can change.
http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com

Love Is Tricky – Poem


Love isn’t just an emotion

Or even a magic potion

God designed it with a purpose

He provides a surplus

When you are all alone

You can feel Him in your bones

Your eyes can not see

But in the Trinity there is three

Why do we not trust

Broken down with rust

Bent out of shape

Pieced together with tape

Lord we hurt so much

We long for Your touch

Shine your light upon us

Help me not to cuss

So many thoughts trapped inside

How come I can’t find a bride

I want to feel complete

I want someone sweet

To have and to hold

Before I get too old

Show me your plan

Teach me to be a fisherman

Not just for someone for me

But also to help others see

That Your plan is better

For You I write this letter

Help me to love

Help me to find truelove

I am willing to trust my life to You

Make my dark skies turn blue

With Christ I can overcome

Help me to become

The person you made me to be

Together let’s agree

That alone I will fail

But with You I can sail

No longer left all alone

Because you have shown

Me how to love and expect nothing

Your love is very touching

With You I am made whole

I have finally found my self-control

Bring me someone special

I promise to be careful

Love them like You have loved me

Together we will cross the sea

Whatever it takes

No matter how high the stakes

We will give you the glory

And that is my story…

God Provides Much – Poem


You thought it would be better

Until you felt cold like a winter with no sweater

You ran to where you thought was safe

Not realizing it caused your soul to chafe

You want to get back to where you once were

But the past has become a blur

You want to have what you once did

But the past was closed with a tight lid

How can you get back

When you lost the track

You can try to recreate

Doesn’t mean the food will taste the same on that plate

The weight of that decision

Has caused you to seek out a new vision

Maybe we can change & morph into something new

Or maybe you just lost that sticky glue

That kept it all together

Despite the painful cold weather

But now it is a new season

You keep looking for the reason

Why did God close that door

Why did you get knocked to the floor

Man will try many things to draw you in

But be careful not to let it be a sin

Life is full of many decisions

Be sure to pray for God’s provisions

If we take the wrong path

It could lead to God’s wrath

So choose wisely & don’t make haste

Because your decisions must be faced

Let your relationship with God be the true reason

That you have chosen to fall into this season

Never let anyone drive you to breaking

It is time for our eyes to begin waking

The truth is exposed for all to see

I pray that you will fall to your knee

Come back to where God wants you to be

Under the branches of this olive tree

Under His wing is warm & calm

When is the last time you read the Psalm

The word of God helps bring us wisdom

When dealing with topics outside of the kingdom

Trust God to open your eyes

To anyone who tries to bring you lies

I wish nothing but the best for you

Even if you decide to leave this crew

Make sure it is God who is calling

And not just your spirit which is stalling

The true voice of God speaks strong

He wants His family to all get along

So stop trying to divide

When Christ says the Church is my bride

Together united we will win

Continue to search within

For the call that God keeps placing

He wants to keep embracing

The feelings that you keep chasing

Together we must be facing

The time is short

Bring it all into God’s court

Let us not contort

The truth but instead show support

God teach us to trust

And no longer combust

Over things that are unjust

Instead we thrust

All our emotions, feelings, and such

To the Lord my God who provides much.

Copyright 2017 KNGMusic and Praise First Publishing

God Did It Again – Sermon Notes

Welcome back again to Faith Matters.  It has been a while since I recorded a message, but don’t fear, God has still been using me in many other mighty ways.  That is actually why He has been tugging at my heart to record this message, but I have just let life get in the way.  But rest assure, that wait has now ended and I am here to share some of the amazing things that God has done in the past several months just to share how good He is.

Let’s open up with prayer.  Heavenly Father I want to thank you for keeping me and my family well through the storms, both physical and literally.  Thank you Lord for guiding my steps when challenges have come up and thank you for giving me the strength to carry on no matter what the challenges may be.  Today Lord, I pray that anyone who listens will be encouraged and know that You are listening to our prayers and You alone can answer them.  Keep using us Lord through this ministry and song to reach Your people, in Jesus name, Amen.

Today I want to discuss the “blessings” and the definition that I found.

God’s favor and protection
A praying asking for God’s favor and protection
Grace said before or after a meal

Naturally the blessing I want to share with you today is God’s favor and protection.  Recently in Florida we were hit with Hurricane Mathew.  My family and I didn’t stay.  I had feelings for several months prior that something big was coming and that something big definitely was Hurricane Matthew.  We saw the damage that it did in the Caribbean and we did not want to stay around to see if it would do the same thing in Florida.  Our house is only a few blocks from the river, but the forecasters were expecting the river to rise.  We are not in a flood zone even with a Cat 4, but didn’t want to take the chance of our house becoming an island among a raging river all around.

We left and ended up in Alabama for several days while we watched the news and waited out the storm.  When we came back home we found that there was no power in the house so we had to throw away all of the food in the refrigerator.  There were tree limbs all over the yard which we had to gather up and place out front for yard haul away which sat there for about 5 weeks.  One of my neighbors Oak Trees split and landed on the fence.  When we walked inside we found that our studio had been flooded.  This was the worst of the damage.  I began removing items from the room to see exactly how bad the damage was.  The items we had to discard were minimal however we were not sure exactly what caused the flood in the room.

We had ordered a new exterior door for that room which was supposed to be installed prior to the hurricane, but they didn’t have any dates available.  At first we thought the water came in from that door because the original home owners had installed the door backwards.  I started to pull up the base boards when I realized that the drywall was coming up with it.  This was rather disturbing because that means the drywall was wet as well and the water had been soaked up.  I peeled away a portion of the wall to look behind it and realized that the insulation was wet and moldy as well.  Talk about a double whammy.  Contacted the insurance company, filed a claim, they did an inspection, and came back saying it wouldn’t be covered because it was a “preexisting condition”.

Now to the common person, this would be the breaking point, but for me I just said God has to have a purpose for all of this.  Not to mention that our hurricane deductible was $4,000 and the damage could be repaired for cheaper if I did it myself.  So instead of being upset that they wouldn’t cover it, I got to work and started tearing apart the room piece by piece.  First we removed the drywall, then the old insulation which led us to find out why and how the water came in.  The previous owners had some dry rot on the exterior wall and instead of fixing it properly they only did the bare minimum to try and patch it up.  Long story short, we had to remove all of the exterior plywood and replace it.  Pretty much our room was down to the studs and you could see the outside from inside the house.  But despite all of this God still had a plan.

My wife kept asking me, “are you sure you know how to do this?”  Don’t tell her I said no, but God gives wisdom when and where wisdom is needed.  It took us about 2 months working pretty much only on weekends due to the time change and it being dark earlier.  We got everything replaced and restored much cheaper by doing it ourselves instead of going through the insurance company.

Philippians 4:19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

Now this was one of the first blessings because there was a structural issue with the house and we had no idea.  The water damage could have destroyed our recording equipment yet God kept all of that safe.  Yes it cost me money to fix everything, time from my weekends, and lots of sore muscles but God kept our house safe from all the massive water Oaks that we have around the house.

2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work. 
Many times since I started recording podcasts I have mentioned that God provides and blesses.  Even though we had to spend the money to get our house fixed, God came through with another blessing by giving my wife a bonus that she was not expecting.  But that wasn’t all; she also got a raise as well.  We both looked at each other and said, “wow God is so good.”  He came through to help show that even though this storm caused us extra work, turmoil, strife, God was still in control of it all.

How many blessings in a row would it take for you to realize that it was God and not just a coincidence?  1, 2, or maybe even 3?  The next thing that happened to us is I had a meeting with our HR department and was advised that they were doing an audit and realized that my position should have never been on salary, but should have always been paid on an hourly basis.  They proceeded to tell me that I needed to fill out a form for the past 2 years for any dates that I would have worked overtime.  Now imagine this, my job just said they are going to pay me extra because they owed me for the past 2 years.  How many times have you heard that happening?  I have never in my life heard of such a thing and all I could say is “thank you Lord.”  One thing after another God kept showing us that He was in control of our lives and that He would provide.

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.
But wait there is another thing.  Prior to Hurricane Matthew I may have mentioned that I had to remodel our bathroom because my wife put her elbow through the shower wall.  This was a project that I had been working on during the summer because the tile in the shower was not installed correctly.  Well God blessed me yet again by providing a great friend and my brother to come in and install the tiles for the shower.  It took all of us about 3 days to build a concrete wall and set the tiles.  My friend told me that normally he charges $4,800 to do that work but for me it was his way of blessing me and my family.  Praise God!

In the midst of many large and overwhelming storms for my family, God showed that He is always with us and He alone could calm the stormy seas.  I say all of this not to brag about myself, but instead to encourage you.  It is important for each of us to daily share our testimonies with others of how God is working in our lives.  What has God done for you?  Sometimes we don’t even realize how hard God is working in our lives because we are too busy running from place to place trying to meet the expectations that this world has set.  Take time this week to slow it down, examine where you are today and where you want to be tomorrow.  God is calling each of us to do more with less so that He can get all the glory.

Let’s close in prayer.  Heavenly Father, thank you for working in my life.  Thank you for constantly knocking sense into me when I start to fall off the path that you have set before me.  I give You all the glory, honor, and praise for all of the marvelous things you have done.  Lord I pray for each person who has taken the time to either listen to this podcast or read it on the blog; Lord open their eyes to what You would have them do.  Teach them to be good listeners and doers of Your word.  Together the people of God can still make a difference in this dark world.  In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

Thank you for tuning in for Faith Matters.  I pray that is blessed you in some form.  Don’t let the troubles get you down; instead turn to Jesus in prayer.  God loves each of you and He wants to show you how much He cares.  If you would like to contact me you can do so on Twitter @KNGMusic or via our website http://www.KNGMusicMinistry.com  Thank you and God Bless.